2CBG MOVIE REVIEW: ‘Get Out’ – of your house and go see this movie!

“Get Out’ reminds me of every great horror movie I’ve ever seen, and why i love them”

30 Second Review: 

Considering that this is a debut feature from a first-time filmmaker, ‘Get Out’ is an instant classic! Has all the markings of a great horror movie + a social message. Comedian Jordan Peele establishes himself as a successful solo act and a household name. 🙂

GOmovie

Full Review:

‘Get Out’ is every Black Man’s worst fears…

Falling in love with that token Becky, that Cute White Chick – only to meet her folks and, they not only turn out to be RACIST – but also psycho. DAMN! Can’t a Brotha have some equal opportunity relations with a fair-skinned Cutie? Not in this movie. LOL 😛

British actor Daniel Kaluuya plays Chris Washington, a Black man dating a White girl who goes on a simple weekend to meet her folks, and shit goes very very bad for him. In fact, shit turns into a NIGHTMARE. And no, its not just because the food is bland and they are lacking hot sauce.

Get-Out-movie

Get Out is an unconventional horror movie which plays as a satire on the conventions of race, politics, and social status. See, there is Racism, and then there’s the other side of racism, the Liberal response, the Big Sister Nanny State, which uses Black paranoia to feed its own Leftist agenda. Only THIS agenda takes it waaaaaaaaaay a step further! lol – That Black paranoia is evident IMMEDIATELY in the opening scene and throughout.  – But we won’t even go THAT deep. In fact, Get Out reminds me of every great horror flick I’ve ever seen, and why I love them. Besides being a horror movie, it’s just a very well made and fun movie 🙂

Key word being FUN. The horror in Get Out comes in many forms and works on different levels. It’s all here: jump-scares, mood, atmosphere, macabre, blood, gore, and a few ‘WTF!’ moments in a very well-balanced and well-paced movie. Really though what more can you ask for? It’s just a fun movie from start to finish.

As a horror movie buff I must point out I can the  John Carpenter/George Romero influence, and that’s a GOOD thing.  And, while not an entirely original concept (there are some trace elements of Being John Malkovich, itself a mind-bender of a movie), it’s definitely a breath of fresh air.

The casting is pitch-perfect! First off, did Allison Williams play the role of Down Azz White Girl to a T or WHAT? 😀 I mean, damn…she IS cute as all fuck, but…

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– I can see how son fell for her cute azz (got himself caught up in some SHIT too). But…

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It’s all in the eyes. Gotta watch them crazy eyes! Funny thing is, I know chicks like her in real life 😛

Bradley Whitfield, who I last saw in the superbly awesome horror romp ‘Cabin in the Woods‘ – (which is on my list of Favorites) plays the White Liberal Dad who tries too hard to show he accepts his white daughter’s Black BF. But…..he comes across as a little TOO cool. And we soon find out why….

Then there’s Caleb Landry, who I last saw as a decent Banshee in X-Men First Class, plays the white GF’s brother, but – is he the ‘Crazy Cool or Crazy Crazy’ Brother? Hmm…

Shout-out to Keith ‘Don’t call me LaKeith anymore’ Stanfield!

Keith+Stanfield

This guy just owns whatever role he takes (Selma, Dope, Compton, Atlanta). Talk about RANGE! Bruh is a nice talent who just outgrew whatever the heck Donald Glover was paying him for Atlanta. Really, at this point the character of Darius seems a bit…beneath his level. His Atlanta salary would be a friendly favor.

And finally, let’s give a warm shout-out to Lil Rey Howery! I have NO idea who this brotha is but he damn near stole the show! Lil Rey’s character basically plays EVERY BLACK PERSON IN ANY HORROR MOVIE haha 😀 He is the best friend brought a level of (comical) common sense to the White People madness. That homey who got your back despite your foolishness. His character was my favorite in the movie!

In the end, Get Out is a definite crowd-pleaser and well worth a watch. This is one of those movies best seen in a full theater or with friends. Plenty of laugh out loud and enough WTF moments that will have you talking about it after the credits roll 🙂

4 out of 5 stars

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Trying to finish Iron Fist.

What it do, world!

I know, I know…its been a week, and you guys miss me. Don’t fret, here i am to bring you the goodness. But first, coffee!

coffee-mug

And now i have to remove my pants. Because shorts are more comfortable. And I’m a grown-ass man. Comfort is everything these days, am i right?

So, about this Iron Fist show…

Its ok.

Not the exactly the best offering from Marvel after following Luke Cage and Daredevil season 2. Don’t get me wrong, the story line is good. A slow build like Cage and Jessica Jones, but I’m not so sure on the plot. Its like the producers took a step backward somewhere. I understand that this is a shared universe with the television show and movie aspects, but rarely do they mention it. A subtle reference to the big green guy isn’t going to cut it. But i do like the fact that they give us more insight into The Hand.

It delves into the story more so than Daredevil did. I am assuming this is going to lead up to the Defenders team up/build up. I also believe that The Rza should’ve directed every episode, as he delivered one of the best ones of the season. I like Finn Jones, his acting is great, but he should definitely tone up before the Defenders drops. I mean, 15 years of studying kung-fu and fighting and sparring everyday should develop a body with .05 percent body fat. Finn is toned, but not ripped, like his comic counterpart.

Rosario Dawson should be given top billing in this series. she’s in over half the episodes and I’m pretty sure she is going to be the glue that brings them all together. does anyone else want ice cream right now?

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ooh, sparkly things!! 😀
      I have the attention span of my 5-year old daughter. I stopped typing to check out the lady who delivers my mail. she’s an attractive woman. Nice thighs.
       Maybe i should start my third career as a photographer and create a calendar. Do people still buy calendars anymore??? I’m a dinosaur, so i do. Sometimes, you just have to go analog is this day and age. (I say this as i type on a computer, and not a typewriter or a telegraph.) … [insert laughing emoji here]
 
 So everyone is all about social media now.
       I’m also about it – the daily checks of Snapchat, tumblr, Twitter (for those who use it still) and occasionally, thefacebook. I am fond of tumblr as a close second behind Snapchat. Unicorns!
 Unicorn-Puking

yup, this is how is end this post. a vomiting unicorn.

Love, peace, and hair grease!

Friday

Posted in Uncategorized

2017…finally a post from Friday!

It happened last week.

All it took was a phone call. Its not like Jay and I don’t talk. We communicate quite frequently. But he said the words I needed to hear, ‘The blog world needs us. They need us two “blerds” back at doing what they do best‘. Entertain the masses with witty rhetoric, game changing predictions, information on the current status of the geek world news, and of course, glorious pics to keep your attention on our page.

Image result for domino marvel

             Last year gave us some hits and misses. And i had to break out the old “How to Type” books just to refresh my memory on how to do this properly for you guys. I’m used to doing things on my phone nowadays like the rest of the robots; at one point i even had an app on my phone so i could post on the go! Well, two kids, two careers (I’m a full time chef now), two states later, two cars and I’m right back in it like i never left. Kind of sort of like Mase. Only if i could get the goddamed pic to load. I almost thought i could get through the entire 1st paragraph without using any foul language.

Almost.

         So, without going into too much of the dwelling on the past, lets look forward to the new 2017 movies.  i mean, who’s not excited to see some major baddies on the big screen this year? Although i don’t think The Vulture is a MAJOR bad guy, he has given the web-head some trouble. But Micheal Keaton is an amazing actor and the fact that Marvel is running this is going to bring some fresh new perspective to the character. GOTG vol. 2 is going to delve into the characters and bring us more hilarity, plus BABY GROOT!!!!!

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Guaranteed to be the next hot Halloween costume.

Come to think about it, i should’ve put some stock in Marvel back when they were trying to sell books when everyone else was gearing up for TV.

         Don’t get me wrong, DC has done a great job of pretending to catch up, but time after time they fail to deliver us a solid hit. Honestly, its time to take a page from Marvel and use in house talent combined with visionary directors (James Gunn came out of nowhere and delivered a sci fi hit!) and producers with deep pockets. I’m most excited for Black Adam out of the current list of movies on the back burner, Wonder Woman notwithstanding.

      Ok folks, I’m done ranting for now. I have to go adult, which was a difficult transition for me. Used to being a one man wolfpack. Yeah, i just dropped a ‘Hangover’ reference on you.

snootchies!

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Suicide Squad: Snap! Crackle! *Fizzle….*

“Suicide Squad feels like an attractive date who turned out to be quite boring”

 

suicide-squad-movie

I feel like I was ‘Catfished’.

For the uninformed, a catfish is ‘someone who pretends to be someone they’re not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.’ (urban dictionary – see also, movie and TV series)

After soooo much long-awaited hype and a mega marketing campaign that pushed The Joker and Harley Quinn as the forefront of the tale, I  went to see ‘Suicide Squad’ with all geek-iness, ready to be Wowed.. Keep in mind I’m a lifelong comic book fanboy of the highest order; I love indulging in fantasy action movies. BUT, dammit – despite this impressive cast, and the promise of something fun and chaotic, unfortunately Suicide Squad was a big disappointment :-/.

In fact, Suicide Squad feels like a sexy date who turns out to be quite boring. Like someone you met on an dating website who looks great in the photos, sounded exciting, and said all the right things we want them to say. Seems like it will be a helluva fun time! – but despite all the gloss and promise, nothing much actually happens. All that built up excitement for a letdown. Overall, this movie just isn’t that good. But there are a few (very few) redeeming qualities which save this from an unmitigated disaster. But then, there are just some downright Terrible elements which had me zoning out at times. So here is the GOOD, the BAD, and the TERRIBLE that was ‘SS”.

Lets start with The UGLY:
This movie has rush job written all over it. From a story perspective it was surprisingly sloppy and the action was ‘by the numbers’. We start with short, choppy montages introducing the cast of Baddies – each with their own soundtrack (that got annoying very quickly). These quick snippets should help us build some kind of empathy or rapport with our cast. But not really. We we got is summaries of a bunch of people we really don’t care about and then watch them do a bunch of stuff for some reason, because a government official says so. They run from Danger Point A -to Danger Point B and shoot things and fight a lot. Shit blows up. One-liners are spewed. And soon I forgot what the plot was even about.

Outside of Viola Davis’ wonderful turn as Amanda Waller (government agent putting this team together) the rest of the script is pretty bad. The dialogue was gawd-awful. I haven’t heard so many terrible one-liners since ‘The Expendables’. I mean…it is REALLY that bad. There are maybe three characters in the movie and I’m thinking to myself ‘Why are YOU even here??? What’s your purpose??‘ I can’t remember the last time I went to a movie with such high hopes and came away with nothing to like about it.
I’m guessing that filmmaker David Ayers had a few days to bang out this script from conception to finish. At least it feels that way. From a direction and editing view, this movie is a technical blunder and looks sloppy. It uses about three different techniques (quick flashes, fade-outs, drug-induced flashbacks?) that have no kind of cohesion with each other. It’s as if Ayer simply tried different camera tricks and hoped one would work. All the scenes rush immediately from cut to cut, OR – even more disturbingly, we get AT LEAST 20 character close-ups that linger longer than necessary. Do we really need to pan in on Will Smith’s face every single time he says something? I mean, the fact that I even notice all of this tells you just how bad the editing job is.

THE BAD:
So the movie is about the ‘world’s most dangerous criminals’. IN the pantheon of DC Comics, these guys are C-level at best. The ‘worst’ bad guys would be Lex Luthor, Darkseid, Doomsday, The Joker, Black Adam – real heavy hitters capable of doing real damage. Instead we get a guy who loves to climb (he dies immediately), a bank robber who tosses a boomerang (aptly named Captain Boomerang), and a Psychiatrist-turned-crime acolyte (Harley Quinn). There are more but does it really matter? Not really. Will Smith’s character Deadshot perhaps qualifies as the TRULY worst of the bunch, playing a an elite assassin of the highest order, the ‘world’s most wanted hitman’ who never misses a shot, ever. Throughout the movie, and we assume it is so egregious that he doesn’t want to talk about it – and yet,

All that being said, this Bad Guy bunch doesn’t quite live up to their reputation. They are not so unspeakably evil as to cause concern (despite getting the Hannibal Lector treatment),  and after being corralled by the government, within a few scenes the movie rushes them into danger to be all heroic and blah blah blah. At no point do we get the feeling ‘Oh man….these guys ARE bad!” NOPE. Nothing to keep our attention for 2 hours.

Here’s where Warner Bros fails to match expectation with delivery. This movie should have been Rated R. Take Deapool for example. ‘Deadpool’ proved to Hollywood that a HARD Rated R action/comedy movie can work IF the story is well-written. Ryan Reynolds’. Deadpool was BRILLIANT. Deadpool delivered on all fronts; witty banter, hilarious vulgarity, clever action pieces all while chopping people to bloody bits with delirious glee. With Deadpool, we laugh our asses off while absorbing the viscera. None of these element exist with Suicide Squad. Not only does ‘SS’ give us nothing to cheer for, it gives us nothing to root against. Nothing to connect to to, and, in the end, NOTHING to care about. It’s a shame, really. So much lost potential.

Well, except Margo Robbie 🙂 🙂 🙂 My Goodness, Margo Robbie is a superstar!

THE GOOD (The very GOOD!)
Harley Quinn single-handedly saves this movie. Where does acting end and reality begin? I swear this was the living embodiment of Harley Quinn! – one of the best characters in recent memory. Margot Robbie NAILS Harley and is the #1 reason to go to see this movie, AND, the #1 reason to STAY and finish the movie! LOL 😛 – Harley was the PERFECT mix of sassy, sexy, sultry, slutty, and DANGEROUSLY chaotic….that was some damn good acting!
Every scene that Harley is occupies is a godsend. Every scene without Harley is really just wasted celluloid. No, seriously. Take Harley out of this movie and it flat out SUCKS. And I do mean suck. This movie wouldn’t have worked without Harley. NOT. At. Allll…..

Enough praise about Harley Quinn. Will Smith does his usual Will-Smith-iness. I mean, its Will SMITH. He nails his scenes and his lines. The guy has mastered effortless charm. We KINDA care about his character and we KINDA care that he succeeds? – But then again we don’t. His character is a cool assassin guy and well, thats it. In all honestly this could have been Will Smith and Margot Robbie (AGAIN), and I would have been fine with that. They have the BEST lines and the best dialogue. The chemistry was so-so, but not forced.
It would have made for an interesting love-triangle between Deadshot, Harley Quinn and…

THE JOKER.

Yeah, forget about the Joker. We were all hoodwinked. Bamboozled I’m not sure what Warner Bros wanted to accomplish here. Did they WANT to piss fans off?? Well, they did. For all the outrageous stories of the immensely talented Jared Leto going ‘full retard’ and method acting the FUCK out of The Joker – apparently most of his scenes got cut out of the movie.
Yes folks, all that hype and glamorous marketing, and the Joker only shows up for a few cut-scenes, flashbacks, and vignettes.
YEP. Total bait-n-switch. Which was too bad, because the Joker /Harley storyline is really what keeps this movie interesting!

Notice I didn’t even mention the plot. Don’t worry it is pointless. The plot is ridiculous. And this is coming from a true comic book geek. This was the whackest plot line in recent memory. I’m not even sure WTF the plot was, but it doesn’t matter. A bunch of scruffy villain are rushed into action to do stuff that we don’t really care about.

And then there was Harley Quinn 🙂

And that really sums up Suicide Squad.

If not for Will Smith and Margot Robbie I would seriously give this movie ONE STAR out of FIVE, just for sucking so badly. Without those two? this movie is unwatchable.

Posted in New Releases