The Hottest Sh*t you NEVER heard: The Foreign Exchange

Damn – you KNOW we had to do it! Our first official music posting!

Friday blessed the masses with his Ultimate Top Ten Rappers List -  and its just like Friday to overdo it, show his azz, bring that HEAT with his incredible blog!    That blog was so well-received that we decided to go on’ head and add a music category – to shine sum light on features, albums, mixtapes, and downloads!

First, let me say that…

I don’t listen to mainstream R&B music.

I think it’s boring, contrived, and quite frankly….kinda silly. Especially the guys! R&B cats be talking about romancing chix with promises of Yachts and mansions…..

$300 bottles of champagne…..

diamond bracelets and shit…

i mean, REALLY?? WHO HAS THAT KIND OF MONEY?! hahaaa  I damn shurr don’t!

Do u know how high the bar is RAISED to run game on a chik – and she listens to say….Joe?? ‘All The Things (Your Man Won’t Do)‘. Haaa! What chance do I have??? lol  And then you have the younger RnB guys, who all sound kinda girly/ gay-ish! And the older cats are boring as hell… And they all use the SAME DAMN producers!! Throw in a voice-changer and a T-Pain/  Little Wayne guest verse, and you really don’t know who the heck you’re even listening to anymore!

…and that is why I cannot stand to listen to mainstream Rap/R&B.

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Which brings me to this MASTERPIECE I recently discovered -

** THE FOREIGN EXCHANGE – ‘Leave It All Behind’ **

Folks…….Words cannot describe how incredibly DOPE this album is!!  But I will  damn sure try……

This CD  is a musical feast for the ears. I think that The Almighty Himself came down….

and blessed Phonte and Nicolay to create one of the lovliest-sounding CDs in the new millineum. You gotta be connected to the underground/alternative scene to catch a instant classic like this! -OR- read this blog

There is NOTHING…and I mean NOTHING on the music charts that can touch this!  And I ain’t sure what genre or how to  CLASSIFY this music – is it  Soul? Neo-Soul? Trans-Atlantic, Experimental-Alternative, Soul/R&B/HipHop Collabo?! haha

Call it what you want, but The Foreign Exchange is my pick for one of the best group/duos out right now – mainstream or otherwise. Need further proof?…

Peep their breathtaking classic debut ‘Connected‘.

(We’ll save this underground *GEM* for another blog.)  :)  But for now…….

Introducing The Foreign Exchange –  Two musicians who produced an entire album literally thru email!

- The Dutch-born Nicolay (the Betterman from the Netherlands) is the greatest Music Producer you’ve never heard of!

This guy is a Genius! – TRUST ME on that.  You haven’t heard production quite like this. Nicolay arranges and crafts, layers and assembles sounds like a master renaissance painter. Musically, he takes you places full of emotion and feeling. Nicolay can paint that solid imagery in your mind- and leave an imprint on your brain. Sometimes his beats are uncannily simple – sometimes, his arrangements are utterly soaring. But whatever the case -

Nicolay makes sounds that stay in your head…FOREVER.

There are only three other producers I can think of that have a purely distinctive sound: Dr. Dre, Timbaland, and the legendary DJ Premier of Gang Starr – And now also Nicolay – who is his own sub-genre of musical production.

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Phonte (of Little Brother) – what can be said?

Coming out of North Carolina- this emcee/singer is part of the new-age hiphop group Little Brother – A nimble rapper and a capable singer…

Phonte sings on the RIGHT SIDE of ‘Sangin’ -  and pulls it off quite nicely! He was definitely that brotha’ that gots busy in the chuuch choir! With silky-smooth smooove falsettos and sincere lyrics – Phonte speaks in R&B that we commoners can relate to: Relationship highs and lows….Telling your girl how much you love her. Getting kicked out the bed (and playing X-Box). Fighting, breaking up, making up and fighting again. Forgetting why you were fighting in the first place. This is something EVERRRRYbody goes thru – with nary a material mention in the verses!

From the signature Foreign Exchange Intro sound (again, Peep ‘Connected’ for further goodness ) until the last note drops…

‘LIAB’ goes down a soulful landscape not typically heard from major releases.  The first song, ‘Daybreak’ is a double-declaration of how a couple feel for each other. Simply and completely beautiful!  The CD only gets better from there on.

To get a tasty piece of this CD – try out Track #3- the haunting  ‘All or Nothing/Coming Home to You‘ – Whoooooo man! WOW…..Seriously? Damn.

Or how about a slice of pure JOY? track #11 – the totally uplifting ‘Something to Behold’ - the feeling of being in love!

Want another tasty morsel?? Try Yazarah’s unbelievably butta-soft Track #8 –  ’If She Breaks Your Heart‘.  Dare I say the silkiest vocals since…..Vinia Mojica?

And If you like those samples – then you DEFINITELY want to cop the entire CD and get the full aural meal! The Foreign Exchange –  ’Leave It All Behind’ – is the hottest joint to NOT hit the charts. A damn shame really.

-Jay

Production: Nicolay is a genius!: A+

Lyrics: Phonte speaks raw realness: A

Guests Vocalists: Perfect harmony!: A+

Overall: You NEED to hear this: A+

 

 

 

 

Quietly Thick Presents: Hayden Panettiere!

QUIETLY THICK is that Background Booty. Background booty is that Thickness happening where u least expect it. Like Six – Jenna von Oy from that TV show ‘Blossom’.

Yesssirr – While Blossom was being Blossom Six was quietly killin us from the background! those of us who knew…KNEW.   The rest of you were thinking ‘That Joey Lawrence surrre is funny!” Riight.

yeh – u slept on that!! lol

And we all had to wait for the show to end to get the REAL Jenna von Oy to bless us with the Realness…..

Sweet Lahd above!

And this tradition of Quiet Thickness still goes today!  We have a new one that graces the screen killin us softly….

Hayden Panettiere aka, Claire Bennett aka the Cheerleader from NBC’s ‘Heroes’.

Just your basic ‘cute as a button’ blonde, right?  Peep Exhibit A:

Whoa – where’d all that come from? Babygirl is all of 4′10″ yet has all kinds of thikness tucked away! In an industry of skinny chix, somehow Hayden continues to rock this slim-thik look and pulls it off PERFECTLY.

Exhibit ‘B’ and ‘C’ please:

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My Gooness what a tasty little tart!   are…. are those Hips? And thighs?? Niiice!

Hayden is definitely a showstopper, no doubt about it. Something about being so small, yet so curvy is just mindblowing.

Let’s check out the rearview angle:

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WOW. Ol girl is a classic! Not a badonka-donk,  but still sum righteous booty. Especially for Hollywood standards!  

filling out every inch of jeans….

And I gotta believe the producers of Heroes knew what the hell they were doing when they casted Hayden!

While others characters are time-traveling, teleporting, setting shit on fire and Sylar is slicing off heads….. Claire just needs to BE on camera and look hot! haha

Check out an Ep of NBC Heroes and peep the Quiet Thickness for yourself.

You’re welcome!

Shaq/Cavs Watch! Shag Yoga

More great Shaq-isms!

Shaq, heard you started up taking YOGA CLASSES?! How is that working out for ya?

“I’m the worst yoga student in the history of yoga,” O’Neal said Thursday.

and what do you feel about your new Cleveland Cavs team?

“It’s probably the best team I’ve ever played on, on paper anyway,”

-Shaquille O’Neal

That is a luvly sight! Shaq inna Cavs uniform

i can already smell tha champagne!

-Jay

the british invansion is upon us!!!!!

So lately I’ve stumbled upon these british glamour models. Magazines like Nuts,

Zoo,

Maxim,

and Front,

have unearthed these beauties cut from the molds of a perverted jesus himself. And by perverted jesus, I really mean me. Cuz I’m perverted. In case you didn’t know, lol. But either way, these are just a few of the lovely ladies we’ve come across while sifting through millions, and I mean MILLIONS!!!!!! of pages on the inter-web. Thanks, The Rock.

And yes, my girlfriend who doesn’t quite yet know she’s my girlfriend will be on here. You can bet your sweet salty ass she’ll be on here! Let’s begin………..

normally, i would start off with the few that i do know. ususally because of lucy pinder. but not today. i’m gonna start off with some relative unknowns to me. first up is:

1. Vikki Blows

 

yes, that is her real name. with expectations to be a page 3 girl since 15, this 21 year old 5′1″ lovely is praised for her “goth” looks, full lips, and 34″ bust. tell me you’re not thinking about piercings, tats, blacklights, and candles right now.

 2. bianca gascoigne

this 22 year old beauty if the step-daughter of professional soccer player Paul Gascoigne. she’s been on reality shows and won them as well, benefitting charities. brains and beauty? she’s one to watch for……

3.Danielle Lloyd

this 25 year old stunner was CROWNED Miss England AND Miss Great Britain in 04 and 06, respectively. stripped of her title due to posing in PLAYBOY, she then went on Celebrity Big Brother and came in fifth. she has lost contracts with Roc-a-wear, Bennetts insurance, and becheeky.com, a lingerie website. she is now a celebrity for hire.

4.abi titmuss

 

A-mazing. simply so. just one word is all i need to explain it, really. this former nurse turned dirty girl has banned her own MOTHER from reading her memoirs! she has released a sex tape, and acter in addition to modeling. she has also dated a Man U football star, something most common amongst these glamour models.

5. Gemma Atkinson

This girl can do it ALL. model, actress, tv personality, video games, charity events, she’s the go-to girl for just about anything. did i mention a big video game debut? yeah, go pick up a copy of Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3 and you’ll see her there.

6. Gemma Massey

 

from supermarket to supermodel, Gemma has followers from England to Europe and of course, the UK. and did i also mention Hef extended his international pimp hand and got this lovely lady to bare her kibbles and bits for the Playboy Cyber Club? you’re welcome!!

7. Hettie Butler

i can’t find any info on this young beauty, to be honest. but do i really need any? exactly. you’re still staring at the damn pic above these words. moving on…..

8. Keeley Hazell

another go to girl, Keeley was a hairdresser who tried her luck at modeling. and won. she has been a model, the face of video games, co-founder of a modeling agency, actress, and singer. what hasn’t she done? a live interview with yours truly…..

9. Kitty Lea

This 20 year old model hates clothing. you know how i know? every pic i found of her was practically stark naked. and here i was trying to find some “tasteful” ones for you for once, lol. but to quote Stevie Wonder…….”Isn’t she lovely?”….

10.Louise Glover

WOW!!!! did you see her stomach? holy hell…………..this scuba diver has had her nose broken, she kickboxes, she models, she sings, she was the first British model to win Playboy Special Editions, photographer, online adult lingerie store co owner…………….

11. Lucy Pinder

i’m not going into the details on my favorite brit ever. i’ve done  it on 3 other blogs. if you’re a true fan, i’m a little obsessed with her, so read the other ones. but enjoy the pics…..so patriotic…….

12. Michelle Marsh

Model, mommy, singer, actress, wife, Page 3 girl, wife, Michelle has it all going on for her. plus, she’s a friend of lucy’s!! and that’s all you need to know, lol………..

13. Rosie Jones

Ahhhh, the wonderful Rosie Jones. 19 years young, hates clothes, spunky, and forget about camera shy……and honestly, how can you not like a girl who names her own boobs Bill and Bob? that’s gotta count for something….

14. Sammie Pennington

Sammie Pennington. guys, who doesn’t like a woman who actually ENJOYS porn?  well, exhibit a here does. she even gave herself a “porn name”, aka Felicity Funbags!! you’ve probably already stopped reading this and started doing a google search on her as we speak. that’s ok, you’ll come back……..

15. Sammy Braddy

30 GG’s!! that’s what this 5′5″ beauty is hiding under her shirt. guys, be intimidated. her shirt wrestlers are probably going to be nominated for the best boobs in England forever. they’ve already been nominated once or twice. hell, she’ll probably win TWO awards!

16. Saskia Howard-Clarke

this brunette was on Big Brother UK in 2005. the massive 34FF’s you’re probably still staring at are real, even though they have been claimed to be fake. you can thanks the asian/indian heritage for that. and can you believe she’s had two open heart surgeries? impressive, right? right? hello?

17. Sophie Howard

Sophie Howard is an ex stripper, fellas. she’s knows how to get that cash for personal gain. and she was doing it at the age of 17! going to a university for English and creative writing, she became a model, and eventually wound up writing a column for Loaded. and she’s back in college!! yaaaaaay!!!

so there you have it. the british invasion is happening, like it of not. better get on board now before they completely take over. soon, we’ll be collecting pounds, driving on the wrong side of the road, and going to starbucks for a “spot of tea”. you know what? fuck it, i’m down for it. but they have to bring these 17 lovelies with them. no ifs ands, or butts (pun intended)

friday, lovin this…….