Quietly Thick Presents: Hayden Panettiere!

QUIETLY THICK is that Background Booty. Background booty is that Thickness happening where u least expect it. Like Six – Jenna von Oy from that TV show ‘Blossom’.

Yesssirr – While Blossom was being Blossom Six was quietly killin us from the background! those of us who knew…KNEW.   The rest of you were thinking ‘That Joey Lawrence surrre is funny!” Riight.

yeh – u slept on that!! lol

And we all had to wait for the show to end to get the REAL Jenna von Oy to bless us with the Realness…..

Sweet Lahd above!

And this tradition of Quiet Thickness still goes today!  We have a new one that graces the screen killin us softly….

Hayden Panettiere aka, Claire Bennett aka the Cheerleader from NBC’s ‘Heroes’.

Just your basic ‘cute as a button’ blonde, right?  Peep Exhibit A:

Whoa – where’d all that come from? Babygirl is all of 4′10″ yet has all kinds of thikness tucked away! In an industry of skinny chix, somehow Hayden continues to rock this slim-thik look and pulls it off PERFECTLY.

Exhibit ‘B’ and ‘C’ please:

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My Gooness what a tasty little tart!   are…. are those Hips? And thighs?? Niiice!

Hayden is definitely a showstopper, no doubt about it. Something about being so small, yet so curvy is just mindblowing.

Let’s check out the rearview angle:

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WOW. Ol girl is a classic! Not a badonka-donk,  but still sum righteous booty. Especially for Hollywood standards!  

filling out every inch of jeans….

And I gotta believe the producers of Heroes knew what the hell they were doing when they casted Hayden!

While others characters are time-traveling, teleporting, setting shit on fire and Sylar is slicing off heads….. Claire just needs to BE on camera and look hot! haha

Check out an Ep of NBC Heroes and peep the Quiet Thickness for yourself.

You’re welcome!

Shaq/Cavs Watch! Shag Yoga

More great Shaq-isms!

Shaq, heard you started up taking YOGA CLASSES?! How is that working out for ya?

“I’m the worst yoga student in the history of yoga,” O’Neal said Thursday.

and what do you feel about your new Cleveland Cavs team?

“It’s probably the best team I’ve ever played on, on paper anyway,”

-Shaquille O’Neal

That is a luvly sight! Shaq inna Cavs uniform

i can already smell tha champagne!

-Jay

the british invansion is upon us!!!!!

So lately I’ve stumbled upon these british glamour models. Magazines like Nuts,

Zoo,

Maxim,

and Front,

have unearthed these beauties cut from the molds of a perverted jesus himself. And by perverted jesus, I really mean me. Cuz I’m perverted. In case you didn’t know, lol. But either way, these are just a few of the lovely ladies we’ve come across while sifting through millions, and I mean MILLIONS!!!!!! of pages on the inter-web. Thanks, The Rock.

And yes, my girlfriend who doesn’t quite yet know she’s my girlfriend will be on here. You can bet your sweet salty ass she’ll be on here! Let’s begin………..

normally, i would start off with the few that i do know. ususally because of lucy pinder. but not today. i’m gonna start off with some relative unknowns to me. first up is:

1. Vikki Blows

 

yes, that is her real name. with expectations to be a page 3 girl since 15, this 21 year old 5′1″ lovely is praised for her “goth” looks, full lips, and 34″ bust. tell me you’re not thinking about piercings, tats, blacklights, and candles right now.

 2. bianca gascoigne

this 22 year old beauty if the step-daughter of professional soccer player Paul Gascoigne. she’s been on reality shows and won them as well, benefitting charities. brains and beauty? she’s one to watch for……

3.Danielle Lloyd

this 25 year old stunner was CROWNED Miss England AND Miss Great Britain in 04 and 06, respectively. stripped of her title due to posing in PLAYBOY, she then went on Celebrity Big Brother and came in fifth. she has lost contracts with Roc-a-wear, Bennetts insurance, and becheeky.com, a lingerie website. she is now a celebrity for hire.

4.abi titmuss

 

A-mazing. simply so. just one word is all i need to explain it, really. this former nurse turned dirty girl has banned her own MOTHER from reading her memoirs! she has released a sex tape, and acter in addition to modeling. she has also dated a Man U football star, something most common amongst these glamour models.

5. Gemma Atkinson

This girl can do it ALL. model, actress, tv personality, video games, charity events, she’s the go-to girl for just about anything. did i mention a big video game debut? yeah, go pick up a copy of Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3 and you’ll see her there.

6. Gemma Massey

 

from supermarket to supermodel, Gemma has followers from England to Europe and of course, the UK. and did i also mention Hef extended his international pimp hand and got this lovely lady to bare her kibbles and bits for the Playboy Cyber Club? you’re welcome!!

7. Hettie Butler

i can’t find any info on this young beauty, to be honest. but do i really need any? exactly. you’re still staring at the damn pic above these words. moving on…..

8. Keeley Hazell

another go to girl, Keeley was a hairdresser who tried her luck at modeling. and won. she has been a model, the face of video games, co-founder of a modeling agency, actress, and singer. what hasn’t she done? a live interview with yours truly…..

9. Kitty Lea

This 20 year old model hates clothing. you know how i know? every pic i found of her was practically stark naked. and here i was trying to find some “tasteful” ones for you for once, lol. but to quote Stevie Wonder…….”Isn’t she lovely?”….

10.Louise Glover

WOW!!!! did you see her stomach? holy hell…………..this scuba diver has had her nose broken, she kickboxes, she models, she sings, she was the first British model to win Playboy Special Editions, photographer, online adult lingerie store co owner…………….

11. Lucy Pinder

i’m not going into the details on my favorite brit ever. i’ve done  it on 3 other blogs. if you’re a true fan, i’m a little obsessed with her, so read the other ones. but enjoy the pics…..so patriotic…….

12. Michelle Marsh

Model, mommy, singer, actress, wife, Page 3 girl, wife, Michelle has it all going on for her. plus, she’s a friend of lucy’s!! and that’s all you need to know, lol………..

13. Rosie Jones

Ahhhh, the wonderful Rosie Jones. 19 years young, hates clothes, spunky, and forget about camera shy……and honestly, how can you not like a girl who names her own boobs Bill and Bob? that’s gotta count for something….

14. Sammie Pennington

Sammie Pennington. guys, who doesn’t like a woman who actually ENJOYS porn?  well, exhibit a here does. she even gave herself a “porn name”, aka Felicity Funbags!! you’ve probably already stopped reading this and started doing a google search on her as we speak. that’s ok, you’ll come back……..

15. Sammy Braddy

30 GG’s!! that’s what this 5′5″ beauty is hiding under her shirt. guys, be intimidated. her shirt wrestlers are probably going to be nominated for the best boobs in England forever. they’ve already been nominated once or twice. hell, she’ll probably win TWO awards!

16. Saskia Howard-Clarke

this brunette was on Big Brother UK in 2005. the massive 34FF’s you’re probably still staring at are real, even though they have been claimed to be fake. you can thanks the asian/indian heritage for that. and can you believe she’s had two open heart surgeries? impressive, right? right? hello?

17. Sophie Howard

Sophie Howard is an ex stripper, fellas. she’s knows how to get that cash for personal gain. and she was doing it at the age of 17! going to a university for English and creative writing, she became a model, and eventually wound up writing a column for Loaded. and she’s back in college!! yaaaaaay!!!

so there you have it. the british invasion is happening, like it of not. better get on board now before they completely take over. soon, we’ll be collecting pounds, driving on the wrong side of the road, and going to starbucks for a “spot of tea”. you know what? fuck it, i’m down for it. but they have to bring these 17 lovelies with them. no ifs ands, or butts (pun intended)

friday, lovin this…….  

 

motorcycles, t-shirts, and poop? not gonna find that here T.G.I.F!……..

people keep walking past my window, distracting me. should i go to another room, or just close the window?

fall’s here. gonna miss spring break. no really, i am. pics like this are ususally taken on spring break when alcohol is rampant and clothes and inhibitions fly.

(just absolutely outstanding………..)

what up, world? i play with flashlights in the dark cuz candles smell good, right? who’s with me? candles smell like whatever the designers want them to. why can’t they smell like things men them to smell like? like Old Spice, football leather, new car smell, and delicious orange chicken (i swear, the minute i see a candle sporting any of those scents, i’m suing everybody up and down the ranks)!

i was reading some info on a guy who built a life-sized lego house and used BING to find other crazy lego creations: this is one of the ones i found during my search.

this is just absoluting OUTSTANDING work. the attention to detail, the time it took to create this masterpiece. its just amazing. check out the fingers coming out of the “lego Carbonite”. just, effing WOW!! if i were Harrison Ford, i would have to pay for this. or have someone recreate this for my creepy StarWars room, lol! what, you don’t have one of those?

(how much did this guy fucking drink? someone’s getting shot when i come back to reality, i swear!)

new line, new cinema. new topic why don’t you stop it? that kinda rhymed.

i am not a Houston Texans fan, but i could be.

(got it? you wanna be a fan right now yourself. need more proof? all you had to do is ask!)

yeah, you wanna buy that ticket and go see a game RIGHT NOW!!!

andyways, yep andyways, kicking footballs, tackles, hard hits, crazy cuts, and body paint is what i’m all about right now. that and math homework, which is should technically be doing, but i’m writing this. and on top of all of this, its raining mice and elephants here? why not cats and dogs, friday? because its an overused term. i’m bringing the new hotness, right Will Smith?

(trust me, this is for my female readers. i do this cuz i love you…….)

see,  Will agrees with me! if only he knew who i was right now……….not saying i want to stalk him, just get a handshake and a pic and an autograph. i still listen to his music. fuck you for laughing so hard you just spit milk and or coca cola (it burns! i know) out of your noses right now. he’s put out some decent albums. and i really liked his last one, Lost and Found. even though he didn’t write any songs on it, he gets 20 mil a movie! i wouldn’t write songs anymore either. i’d just come up with a topic, have some new hot young Thundercat (most likely Panthro, he’s cool looking with his spikes)

pen me up a hit, pay him his money, and talk about how he’s gonna be a star and sign him if my album sells more than wood in this day and age. capice? oh yeah, i’m part italian this week.

so one night, Spain and Germany went out to a club for dancing and some drinks with friends. they spotted each other from across the dance floor. Spain waved, Germany smiled. Spain motioned for Germany to join him on the floor, to which she shyly obliged. the dancing was sensual and rhythmic, their bodies combining together to become one with time, space, and with all the other countries in the club. conversation was had, more drinks were consumed, and Spain invited Germany back to his place, where they went into the MTV Cribs bedroom and ”the magic” happened. but Spain wasn’t really careful and didn’t use protection, so nine months later, a child was produced. and in 2008, that child decided to venture out into the adult world on its own. that childs’ name was Audrey Bitoni. 

well done, Spain and Germany. well done. the combination of your ethnic backgrounds produced this scrum-diddly-umptios beauty. my hats’ off to you for such a majestic creation. and she does “adult movies”. that is OUT-standing to say the least. you have scored a touchdown, a hat trick, a grand slam, a gooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllll, a hole in one, and aced a set all with the timely delivery of this young lovely. applause, cheers, and champagne bottles are popping here in the house that 2CBG built. jadakiss agrees.

(if you’re looking at the diamonds, that’s why he’s smiling. can rappers be sponsored by Jordan?)

the post-season of baseball is here, and my Yankees are in, and hopefully they win it all. they are definitely poised to go all the way. The Angels beat the Red Sox, so i’m fine with that as well. but last night i drank 2 Monsters, one blue and one green.

needless to say, my algebra class got preeeety interesting after that. my teacher got to see a side of me she and the rest of my classmates hadn’t yet seen. they got to see the real friday last night. not that i’m an ass or anything, just i’m a crazy person taking crazy pills and crazy things can happen when i let that guy completely loose, which i did. and my pee smelled funny later that night. but that was probably due to the magically delicious combination of Cap’n and Smirnoff with juice, bitch!!

now all i need is a parrot! which would’ve been annoying to wake up to this morning in the bed, lol! damn fine product, rum is. i see why Jack Sparrow was hiding massive amounts of it!! if it had nutrients and vitamins and didn’t destroy your liver, it’d be my water. you remember water, right? it’s clear too!! it has minerals in it. and you can drive on it no matter what amount you have in your system! and the best part about water? cops can’t stop you if you’re drinking it while driving!!! YES!!!!!!! i love you, clear water filtered and calorie free.

friday,lookingattherainoutsideandwonderingifgaloshesaregonnabeneededfortodaywhenhegoestositinthe hottub!